Something that I’ve always thought about games is that it’s a unique avenue for us to empathize with others. While other more descriptive mediums let us follow a character’s thoughts in detail, games let us walk in their world, make decisions with the same considerations, and deal with their world in an intimate and relatable way due to its interactivity. Yet, in some ways, this empathy is still different than being able to truly empathize with others, to understand another’s feelings and thoughts in totality. Walking in their shoes is only one part of the equation, understanding their thoughts is another, but in the end you really aren’t, them. You haven’t experienced the world in the exact way they’ve experienced it, you haven’t thought the same thoughts nor made the same decisions as they did when encountered with the same problems. What I’m trying to say is that in the end, no matter how hard you try, there will always be some distance between you and another individual. You can’t inject their memories into yours as though you have lived it yourself, and even if you could, that is still insufficient because you are you. You aren’t them, stuck in their body, stuck with their memories, and stuck in their unique position in the world.

In that sense, the quest for true empathy between individuals is impossible. And I think that’s a saddening tragedy. You, as a unique individual in the world, will never ever be able to truly understand the feelings and the perspective of another being. Maybe you could understand them on some higher level, and communicate it with the same language that they do, but there will always be some gap, some space in that understanding.

Maybe what I’m describing above seems minor, trivial, and inconsequential to day to day life, and I don’t argue against that, but I don’t think that takes away the tragedy and sadness of it. There are over 7 billion people on earth as of today, each with their own lives, perspectives, and experiences, just as your own. And ultimately, who you are, your specific circumstances and experiences, are only a minute part of all that exists in the world. The people we meet, the food we eat, the places we go to, are all drastically different between individuals. And I think that is something awe inspiring and beautiful, that so many others exists, just like you, and me. Doesn’t that blow your mind? That over 7 billion more human experiences, just like the one you’ve had your entire life, exists out there.

Within the experiences of these individuals, a vast majority of them would likely have a completely different world view from your own. What seems ordinary to you, might seem extraordinary to others. And in reverse, what seems amazing and unreachable from your point of view, might be part of their day to day life. Don’t you want to understand that? To feel, to live, and to think from a perspective that feels so alien and foreign to you right now, and have it feel as natural as blinking? To really understand and take that perspective of the world; to live through it, to think through it, to struggle through it; and to understand that perspective, not just through reason and logic, but through your feelings, your body, and your instincts; to know how someone could see the amazement in what you find ordinary, and the boredom in what you find exciting; and to know how someone could see the beauty in what you find repulsive, and the vileness in what you find charming.

And to not be able to do that, to never be able to fully close that gap in understanding, that is a tragedy.

The Silver Lining

On a brighter note, although I took a mostly pessimistic view above, I do think there is a nuanced, and perhaps empowering conclusion to be drawn here.

Part of never being able to understand another means that others can also never truly understand you. Only you understand the world through your own perspective, only you know what you want, and only you have lived, as you. What I’m trying to say is that you are unique, maybe similar to thousands, millions, or even billions of other people in some aspects, but you are still you, a unique product in the world that no one else can truly understand aside from you. Most importantly, only you, and not anyone else, have the sole privilege to live as you. And that also means your life is in your hands, it is up to you to stand up for yourself, to make the hard decisions in your life, and ultimately, it is up to you to strive for the life that you want to live. So go out there, live your life, because that is your privilege, and no one can take that away from you.